8/11/19 ***I am wearing my CITIZEN SOLDIER VARIATION today

The 5600 Rasta arrives today.  It is a scale down model compared to the 5600 Solar.  The band is stiffer too.

Whatever it is, it's worth the money.  Speaking of money, I still didn't get the refund for the Street Urchin.  They had been courteous though.  So I still have high hopes to see my money.

It is quite timely for Rasta to arrive today.  Basically after this I like to curl up with a mug of Nescafe reading the Zen Mind.

I did manage[s] to go through 2/5 of the book last night.  The concept of Zen is basically the concept of Fuzzy Thinking all the way.  Otherwise how do you make sense of this statement:  To walk a mile to the East is to walk a mile to the West.  Can you figure that out?

Zen like Fuzzy Thinking is all about dealing with paradoxes.  You understand Zen, you thrive in paradoxes.  For example Suzuki Roshi said there is no dualism.   And yet his thought process is [] (all) about dualism.  When he said form is form and emptiness is emptiness, that itself is a dualism.  WTF!  LOL.  That makes him a living, breathing, paradox.

In a way I am a paradox myself.  That's why Zen appeals to me much.  I don't like absolutes.  To me absolute means rigidity.  I am fluid.  I have to be Sarah, I'm a free radical.  I assimilate everything that I pass.  With iron I become Ferum Oxide.  With wood I become Carbon Dioxide HAHAHA.  I cannot help to think how funny it is.  Never mind Sarah...  It's a private joke.  Hard to explain here.  You might not see the lighter side of it LMAO.

I got to go baby.  Awww...  I love to talk to you the whole day but I got to finish 5 books no[t] to get to 40 Rules of Love.

I am so in love with you Sarah.  I hope the book will make my heart bloom so that I can take more of your love inside me.

Later baby.  The good thing is now I am CONFIDENT I am God and you are [] (my) Goddess of Love.  Isn't it wonderful?  We are living in a magical world after all.  Much like Disney (Yes Din).  See?  I just pulled a magic trick right before your eyes.

Gosh do I want to fuck you good baby.

Gotta go...

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