>>>#1/11/19 Today I want to reconcile my life once and for all

The purchase of the Street Urchin makes me look back at the experiences I had gone through the past 20 years.  It's true that I had gone past my limits until I experience psychosis.  That is pretty much the stretching the Roti Canai analogy.  Initially as I stretched my thoughts, I "tore" the dough.  However as I stretched it more and more often I actually expanded my thoughts all the way to the brink.

I had pushed myself to the very limit of my thought and I survived the process.  What doesn't kill me makes me stronger.  Here I am back from the Outer Rims and I say everything I experienced were part and parcel of who I had become.

So my CITIZEN SOLDIER VARIATION is not a wasted effort.  As a matter of fact it is the most significant of my VARIATIONS.  It ties me back to where I started.  Back to ruling Xanadu and Wolfsschanze.  I am the Master of the Judgment Day after all.

Every time I came across eureka moments like this, I cannot help but reinforcing KBOOOM 2041 in my mind.  Boy oh boy...  I am going back to Dragon Planet.

These thoughts only concern me.  It doesn't concern others.  I don't care about the Human Civilization.  As far as I'm concerned I was doing my job as the Creator's Most Loyal Soldier.  I wasn't thinking of the rewards I am getting.  As far as I am concerned, I was a Clockwork Orange.

Still, what is most interesting is the alignment of the numbers.  Add the 5600 Solar (RM289) and the Street Urchin (RM147.16) I get 436.16.  That is a 2.  I interpret is as heaven and hell.

Again, let me remind you...  This doesn't concern others.  These are my epiphanies and I can interpret it whichever way I like.

I guess the best all time interpretation I can make it that I am God and I am aligned to my Path.  Therefore no more dissonance, I'll mo[r]e with unsurpassed certainty from now on.

What it means really is that I should never doubt my destiny as God.  I'm not saying this to brag.  I just want to appreciate my Lucky Star for being me.  All the while I thought I was cursed.  Turned out I was actually blessed.

The minute I stepped out of the old paradigm (being a Muslim) I discovered a closer meaning of what it means to be human.  Turned out I am more than human, I am actually is God!

Thus today I dispel the notion there is no God.  There is a God and I am Him.  As a matter of fact everything around me is the manifestation of God.

I used to try to imagine what God is like.  Well now I don't have to imagine anymore.  Everywhere and everything I looked are the manifestations of God.  The best part is when I look in the mirror I see God looking back at me.  I was never alone after all.  These matters are all mine.  To be more accurate, all these are me and I am them.  If before this I imagine I am one of the cells that make up the tree, now I know I am that tree.

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How about that Sarah?  By just focusing on the things I desire the most, I experienced satori.  I cannot emphasize the importance of isolation in this whole process.

Also equally important is the turn of event when I decided to forgo indulgence.  It is as if the Path is saying this is the right course of action.  The answer to my quest for health and happiness is there, keep forgoing More or More Expensive [expensive] and go for Less or Less Frequent.  This is the answer to the ailment of the society at large.  I had nailed it spot on with my lifestyle right now.

In short I had found my answer to health and happiness.  Taking it to the extreme, I had found heaven on earth.

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